Preparing Your Child for Their First Therapy Session

When I meet with parents who are preparing their child for therapy, they are often concerned with how to talk to their child about this important endeavor.

Many children are pleasantly surprised to see that my office is full of toys and art supplies. They are excited that I have fun prizes as a reward system. 

Kids often don’t have a category for what counseling is, so they liken it to a doctor’s office. While doctors are incredibly helpful, we want children to understand the difference between therapy and a doctor’s appointment.

Here are some things to consider when communicating with your child:

Tell your child why you believe therapy will be helpful. Instead of naming all their struggles that could cause shame, state what positive changes you hope they will get out of it. 

Examples: “Your counselor will give you new ideas for how to worry less before tests.”

“I know being angry is no fun; your counselor is going to help you learn to tame your anger.”

“Things have been tricky in our home; the counselor is going to help you work through these feelings.”

Tell your child more about the therapy room.  Let your child know that two important goals of therapy are that it is helpful and fun! Tell them that the therapist will have games, toys, and art activities. When our therapists get to know your child, they work to incorporate things they enjoy in the sessions.

Let your child know therapy is a safe place.  It can be helpful to express to your child that they are safe to say absolutely anything in session and that their therapist will not only not judge them but be proud of them for opening up. Let your child know that the therapist does not tell others what is said in sessions. (Parents are informed of therapeutic information). The first session is for the therapist to get to know you.  Let your child know the therapist will be eager to learn about their hobbies, sports, and interests. 

Do not tell your child too far in advance.  If your child is prone to anticipatory anxiety, consider not telling them too far in advance. Often two days before the session is optimal.  It’s helpful to give them a bit of time to process. For children who desire therapy, telling them sooner about an upcoming appointment is helpful for them. 

Parent session. It is not always necessary, but setting up a parent session before meeting with your child’s new therapist can often help you feel more confident and have positive information to share.  

By: Kim Scheidegger